Saif Ali Khan on Parenting Sara and Ibrahim: 'You Can Only Be As Happy As Your Least Happy Child'
The actor speaks about parenting his grown-up children, both working actors, and learning to step back.
For Saif Ali Khan, being a parent to grown-up children comes with a particular kind of helplessness. Watching them stumble, he admits, is often harder than stepping in to fix things. “For parents, I think one of the hardest things is to watch your kids struggle. You want to say, ‘Forget it. I can fix this for you’,” he says.
But over time, he has had to make peace with the fact that he can’t. “It’s been a process for me, understanding that I can’t fix everything. They need to have their own struggles and their own challenges.”
Asked how much he’s able to distance himself from Sara Ali Khan and Ibrahim Ali Khan’s journeys, especially given how unforgiving the film industry can be, Khan is honest. “I can’t really distance myself,” he says. A line shared by a friend has stayed with him. “You can only be as happy as your least happy child,” he says.
He speaks warmly about Sara’s life outside films, mentioning that she’s back at Columbia University and is currently in New York. “She’s in the library, she watched a good play yesterday. I’d love to encourage that side of life apart from the stress of movies.” Acting, he believes, should be approached as a craft, not a competition. “All too often, it becomes stressful and competitive,” he says, adding that it’s something he actively tries to guide his children away from.
With Ibrahim, Khan often talks about visibility. “I keep trying to say something about appearances,” he explains, noting how constant public exposure can dilute mystery. “It’s very old-school to say I should only see you on screen, but every time you go out, you’re recorded.”
He also admits to something many parents quietly fear. “There’s this scary idea that it won’t be perfect for everyone. If every child has a good school, good college, good job, happy life, that would be a dream. But there might be some rocks in the road for some of them.”
Watch the full interview with Saif Ali Khan on our YouTube channel